Today, my boyfriend questioned why I always put my shirts in the dryer right before wearing them. I told him it was because the dryer causes my shirts to regain their form and tightness. His response: "You should throw your vagina in there along with them." SML

I just waka from aboard Virgin Airline walking pass Immigration and well wishers who are saying good bye to their loved ones ,when walking through the airport gate i found out that i left my passport with the Immigration officer who checked and cleared me at terminal checkpoint only did i know that he was my former girlfriend husband, what do i have to say now to him....?

So I met this guy and we were both feeling each other. So he called and asked me out on a date, which I agreed. So when he came to pick me, I asked him where we were going to for the date, he replied and said the Science Centre, lets go see how our babies will look.... hmmm?? first date, major turn off... See my life.

I was trying to show my splitting skills amongst my close friends and family, however, as I started descending, I started farting loudly for the full 20 seconds it took to reach the floor. See my life

Ever since I was born, I've had a lazy eye. This morning my boyfriend broke up with me. He thought it was funny to state that we just weren't looking at life in the same way. SML

so back in those days i always thought i had it going,especially when my friends and i sleep with our girlfriend's friends i thought i was a pro,just to find out last week from one of my ex-girlfriend's friend that i had slept with as well, that rumor had it back then that my penis was so tiny as an infant's penis and they all just wanted to see it, what really hurt me most was that they all faked d orgasm just to make me feel good about myself. in other words they all feel i wasn't man enough.

Today, I freaked out when the remote wouldn't unlock my car. I stood in the rain trying to open the door. Unsure of what to do next, I called my boyfriend. He told me to "put the key in the door". I had forgotten about that option.

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it he said "I don't know what you're talking about Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. See My Life

Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks.

So i just finished takin my shower, gettin ready to embark on my 2 hour drive back home to my fam. cologne poppin, fresh boy status. i got into my car fixing my mirrors and gettin comfy. i saw this lady trying to talk to me from across the road so i rolled down my window and as the lady approached my vehicle, i noticed she had bout 4 teeth left in her mouth and she asks 'Can i do a blowjob for some change' i screamed 'hell fuckin NO' and the lady was scared she ran away. i was so disgusted. After all my fresh boy status, is this the best i can attract? Chei.......SEE MY LIFE